I think that the reason girls think it’s “obsessive/creepy” is that they EXPECT guys to be jaded by dating. If a girl says she’ll get back to you, they expect you to make other plans. It’s sad that it’s gotten to this point.

With that being said, I also can identify very strongly with the girl you’re speaking of–I used to be the same way. I couldn’t say no. I’m still not great at it, but I’m at least better at it now. Keep this in mind: it’s her PROBLEM. If you get the sense that she’s a nice girl, don’t think it’s a lack of respect as much as the fact that she really doesn’t know how to deal with people not liking her, or more specifically, being in agreement with her.

However, I believe that hearing feedback from the other person’s point of view is absolutely essential in changing your behavior.

Speaking from the other end of the table now, I’ve also had this happen to me many times. I’ve gotten to the point where I’m very jaded now. I think it’s helped me, in the sense that I’m not actually expecting anything anymore. Am I more personally satisfied? Yeah, totally. Couldn’t be happier, really. I’m still not in a relationship, but whatever!

I was tweeted by a female who said that my post could be perceived as obsessed/creepy. Quite frankly, I’m not surprised to get that response from the opposite sex. Though, quite frankly, I don’t see what is considered obsessive about my post other than the fact that I took the time to eloquently (in my opinion) to articulate my thoughts and concerns…even if it was a long email.

Moreover, it bothers me that some women would say such things. It’s comments like that that prevents many women from wanting the 2 things they want out of a guy- communication and honesty. Comments like that stigmatizes many men because no man wants to be perceived as a stalker or a lunatic. So we’re left with no voice and left to hide in our corner of the world.

That’s why I hesitated to write this to begin with but I’m pretty secure with who I am as a person. But I know there are plenty of guys (and girls) who probably feel how I felt. When you label us, you negate us.

No sense in leading someone on.