The Art of Conversation is Dying.

Posted on | March 2, 2009 | No Comments

I just had a friend chat with me over Google chat. He said he hadn’t heard from me in a while and wanted to check in by asking a few simple questions. I said there is something called a phone. Why instant message me when you can simply call, I said. To which he replies, “True. The art of conversation is lost.” Not completely lost, but definitely dying.

I have noticed this art dying since being exposed and working on the web for the past several years. People today, especially the younger generation, don’t know what it’s like to actually have a conversation and enjoy it. Why call when you can just sign my Facebook wall. Why have drinks with me when you can just instant message me. Why ask a girl out over the phone when you can just text message her. Conversely, why dump a guy over phone or email when you can break his heart over text. Why get a bunch of friends together for brunch and talk about what’s new when you can just update your Facebook status. Why tell someone you don’t want to be friends when you can be a coward and just defriend them via Facebook. Why email me when you can just tweet me in 140 characters or less. Hell, why bother at all.

Let’s just lock ourselves up in a closet and call it a day.

It is ironic that given the technology we are afforded today and how it’s supposed to allow us to stay connected, it is actually doing just the opposite.

I value a good conversation any day of the week. Conversations opens up new opportunities. A new friendship can be made. New business opportunities can occur. Horizons can be broadened. Conversation = connection.

Social media today has made us accessible in a way unimagined before. However, this level of accessibility has created a false impression of rapport.

We’re very lazy about how we communicate today. We just send off texts, chats, and tweets without ever realizing the full consequences of them. Or better yet, we don’t realize how much we are under utilizing other tools of communication. There are many who actually believe these to be actual ways to communicate. In some regards, perhaps, but in others regards, it is actually retarding our innate ability to truly communicate in a succinct and effective way.

But I’m not here to use social media as a scapegoat for our inability to have a conversation. There are many other reasons including everyone being oh so “busy” to not even bother. Too many reasons to list as to why this art is dying.

But here’s the point that I want to make. Pick up the phone. Meet in person. Be a good listener. Be engaging. Be interesting by being interested. Learn wit. Learn to tell a story. Practice talking and articulating intentions and thoughts. All of these contribute to a wonderful art that so few have mastered.

Now if you excuse me and I have to go check my Facebook. Apparently, someone just tagged me and wants to me list 25 random things about myself via Facebook notes. Apparentley, a dinner get together is no longer a viable option to get to know me. The sign of the times…